HANSL
PHOTOGRAPHY & TEXT: EMILIANO VITTORIOSI
26.04.2021
I am writing this post, to get some thoughts down, to make you understand how a process of creating and composing a project is composed.
Yesterday I met another possible person to be included in HUMANS, I must say that I have proposed the project to more than 100 people and the responses are always positive, but one thing is the proposal and another is the process. When you get a yes, an appointment there begins the most difficult part, the duration of the relationship with that person.
You don't have the confidence that something can go on or not, not always what you want makes up 100% of a two-way relationship.
Yesterday I met Hansl a girl from South Korea, we talked about her, her life in Berlin, what she does for a living and how she makes a living. We talked about dreams and perspectives, about feelings in the moment, here and now.
I asked her to choose a word that represented her, she replied, LONELINESS.
I would like to start with her from this point and also make her understand the intentions of my project, the density of emotions behind this mechanism.
Below I would like to show you two photos of Hansl that I took at the meeting itself. I'm very happy with the result of these two photos because first of all they give me energy to elaborate them and above all because after having sent them to her, she was also very happy with them. Moreover, we agreed to continue talking and focusing on this concept of LONELINESS , which I think is very interesting to deepen.
I received a message from Hansl this morning.
She wanted to share with me a short note about Loneliness:
She wanted to share with me a short note about Loneliness:
Loneliness
I sometimes feel too vulnerable to admit that I feel lonely cos then people would give me this and that advice, or they would pity me or they would tell me I should overcome this and be stronger. Can I not be just accepted as a lonely person? I don't seek a solution, I just want to feel understood.
I talked to my therapist about it and I decided to confront my loneliness.
Just as it is.
I think this extreme amount of time I am spending all by myself due to social distancing and isolation made me feel quite disconnected from people. Especially when I am still quite new in the city, and my family lives far away. I then tried to fill this gap by pursuing online connections which end up making me feel more lonely.
Sometimes I even feel too tired to try so hard to make new friends and impress them. It is not easy to sustain friendships when everybody around me is emotionally exhausted. Texting again and again to a person who never replies makes me sad.
I stop trying at some point thinking that maybe it is not too bad being alone after all. Although I feel a little lonely...
2.05.2021
I took a walk with Hansl, we talked about what he shared with me the day before.
What I love about my work is how I do my work. What is essential to me, is making people feel free to be who they are.
This chat with Hansl, made me discover some interesting and clear sides of her. It is a great opportunity to be able to relate to others. I consider this process and this project a gift.
We chatted for a long time and I think this chat was needed to get to the point where Hansl was free to not have to worry about other people's expectations. I am very pleased with the photos below!
9.05.2021
During the day I met Hansl at Tempelhofer Park (Tempelhofer Feld), with her skates, a short meeting but I was very happy to see her happy.
The sunny day and all the happy people were having a blast, summer Berlin is coming back and with it all its craziness.
PS. He is a friend of Hansl's, unfortunately I can't remember the name, but that comes normal to me when I don't actually hear lol. I wanted to add him to the journal though because he is part of it....
